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Solo recuerda quién es la puta de esta oficina ".
You just remember who's got the whoring mouth in this room. "
Solo quería decirte que ella desapareció ".
And I just... I wanted to let you know that she's missing. "
Solo sabía que necesitaba verla.
And I just knew I needed to see her.
Yo le estaba limpiando la cara y solo decía :
And I was wiping her face and just saying :
Esto no es solo una historia.
This is not just a story.
"Sencillamente no creo todo esto".
"I... I just don't believe all this."
No teníamos la más remota idea.
We were just oblivious.
Eso se daba por hecho.
You know, that was, uh... It was just understood.
Yo tenía unos 38 años y estaba terminando un programa de dirección espiritual.
I was about 38 years old and just finishing up a spiritual directing program.
Solo sabía que era incómodo. Sabía que Keough no me gustaba.
I just knew it was uncomfortable, I knew I didn't like Keough,
He rezado durante una hora o una hora y media todos los días. Y decidí que en esa Cuaresma haría lo que mejor hacía yo, que era rezar, calmarme, estar tranquila, y trabajar con eso al nivel de la oración.
I have prayer for hour, hour and a half every day... and I decided that Lent, I would do what I did best, which was take it into prayer... settle down, and just be still... and work with it on a prayerful level.
Sencillamente era querido.
He was just beloved.
Decían que todos estábamos de acuerdo que nos asegurábamos de que todo estuviera en orden.
They kept saying we were on the same page, all doing... You know, just kind of making sure everything's in place.
" No entiendo por qué usted haría algo así.
" I just can't understand why you would do something like that.
Y sencillamente no sabemos.
And we just don't know.
no solo el abuso cometido por esos dos sacerdotes, sino también por otros adultos como la policía y un hermano Bob, que también había estado abusando de mí.
I've now remembered... not just the abuse that these two priests had done... but also there's other adults, like the police... and this Brother Bob...
Entonces, para mí, mi opinión de la Iglesia católica era...
So, to me, my view of the Catholic church was just...
Ella estaba en el proceso de recuperar recuerdos. Algunos días era capaz de sentarse, hablar y planear, y otros días simplemente decía :
She was in the process of recovering memories, and some days she was able to sit down and talk and plan, and some days she just said, " I...
Todo el tiempo es como si estuviera en una niebla, en una nube y es como si...
And the whole time I'm... Like, I'm just in a fog. I go into a fog, a spacey place, and it's like "Ahh," you know.
A medida que pasaba la noche, llegaba algo.
I'm just kind of... As I go through the evening, something was coming. Something was coming.
Sinceramente, por un segundo pensé :
In all honesty, there was just a second I thought :
Te dicen algo tan difícil de comprender.
You're told something that is just so hard to fathom.
" Dios mío, no puedo creer que haya hecho esto.
" My God, I just can't believe I did this thing.
Teníamos la vida exterior, en la que todo está bien, y teníamos teníamos una bomba estallando dentro de mi casa y todos están tratando de sobrevivir.
Like, there was the outer "everything's fine" life, and there was, like, there's a... There's a bomb going off inside of my house and everybody's just trying to survive it.
Y el solo hecho de que quisiéramos pasar tiempo con ella era doloroso.
And... And even us coming in and wanting to spend time with her was just painful.
Todos los hermanos estaban en mi comedor.
And it was ever... Just about every sibling was in my dining room.
Nos sentamos y escribimos a mano nombres y direcciones. Pusimos estampillas y las mandamos.
And we sat around there and we just handwrote out names and addresses, threw stamps on it, just threw it out.
Me gusta hornear probablemente tres veces por semana. Me parece que me calma.
I like to bake, like, probably three times a week, and I just find that it calms me down.
Cuando leí esa carta, me emocioné mucho.
I just got so excited.
Las cosas fueron de mal en peor después de eso con el padre Maskell.
And things just got bad to worse after that with Father Maskell.
Simplemente le parecí linda.
He just thought I was cute.
Parece que este habría sido el lugar indicado...
It just seems like this would have been the place where you would...
Creo que los han amenzado con armas y les han dicho que podría ser muy malo no solo para ellos, si se meten de lleno, sino también para sus familias.
I believe they have been shown weapons and told not just... "This could be very bad for you if you get deeply into it," but, "Your family could pay the price."
- Simplemente lo cerraba.
She just killed it, then.
Joe escribía como pocos alumnos saben escribir, y su discurso era maravilloso, así que era un alumno extremadamente bueno.
Joe wrote like few students can write, and his speech was wonderful, so, he was just extremely good as a student.
Yo esperaba mientras sacaban las cosas del hoyo.
And I'm just waiting as they pull all this stuff out of this hole.
Quizás sí lo encontramos, pero no lo recuerdo.
Maybe we did, I just don't remember that.
No descreía a las víctimas, pero no tenía suficiente para seguir adelante.
I didn't disbelieve the victims, but I just didn't have enough to go forward.
Solo hablaban sobre la estudiante y la alumna desconocidas y el abuso que había ocurrido en Keough a principios de los 70.
They just talked about Jane Doe and Jane Roe and the abuse at Keough that had happened in the early'70s.
... de juicio inminente Me sentía muy culpable, pero también me autoprotegía. No quería que nadie tocara mi vida feliz.
I felt really guilty, but I felt so self-protective, you know, that I just didn't want anybody to touch my happy little life.
Así que se sentó detrás de mí, y podías sentir que era un león, y yo esperaba que él saltara sobre mi cabeza y mordiera a uno de ellos en la garganta.
So, he sat behind me, and you could feel like it was a lion, and I just was waiting for him to go over my head and grab one of these guys by the throat.
Maskell renuncia Solo sé que tras la noche en que Bob Erlandson y yo fuimos a misa, nunca volví a verlo.
I just know that after the night Bob Erlandson and I went to Mass,
El doctor McHugh simplemente arruinó toda la idea de los recuerdos reprimidos y recuperados.
Dr. McHugh, he just basically poo-pooed the whole idea of repressed memory and recovering memories.
REPRESENTA A LA ARQUIDIÓCESIS Y mis abogados decidieron que debía mirar al juez y no a los abogados cuando me interrogaran.
And my lawyers decided that I would just look at the judge and not look at the lawyers as they questioned me.
Me pasaban tantos pensamientos por la cabeza, pero solo miraba al estrado mientras ellos me interrogaban.
It was, like, so many thoughts going through my head... but I just took the stand and... And they questioned me.
Me di vuelta y lo miré directo a los ojos.
I just turned, I stared him right in the eyes.
Dijo : "Me sentí orgulloso cuando giró la cabeza y lo miró fijo como si le dijera que le preguntara lo que quisiera".
He said, "I was so proud of her when she just turned her head and looked right at him, like," Go on, ask me your questions. "
Tenía curiosidad porque parecía estar muy involucrado con la policía todo el tiempo.
I was just curious'cause he seemed to be so involved with the police all the time.
Era como otro miembro de la policía para mí.
He was just like... any other member of the police force to me.
Es solo que ahora sabemos mucho más sobre la memoria.
It's just that we now know so much more about memory.
Me permití simplemente existir.
I quieted down... and I let myself just kind of be.